Back To It

NOTE: Starting June 2015, I began writing a monthly column for the News and Tribune again. I plan to archive the columns here as well.

HARBESON: The Big Comeback

Recently overheard on the Big 4 Bridge:

“Harold did you hear about that Debbie Harbeson lady? Rumor is she’s writing a column again for the paper!”

“Ugh. Why won’t she just go away?”

“Well , I heard that she backed herself into a corner and sort of has to do it.”

“What do you mean Hazel? Did she lose a bet?”

“Something like that. She apparently told a few people that she’d go back to writing a column when thoroughbred horse racing gets another Triple Crown Winner. Now she’s stuck I guess!”

“No, we’re the ones who’re stuck. First we have to forever endure the misspelling in American Pharoah and now this? I don’t know if I can take it.”

Hello, dear reader. Yes, the rumor is true. It’s me, back again. This is my second – or wait, maybe it’s my third comeback. (Sorry, I can’t remember. I quit and restart so many projects and it’s easy to lose track.)

What? You don’t care for comebacks? Oh come on, that Rocky V was the best! Also, if Baron Hill, who recently announced he’s running for Senate, can come back then I can too. So there.

That remark probably makes you think I am going to continue writing primarily political commentary. But you would be wrong. I definitely quit that.

Yep, I’m done. When it comes to politics, I just don’t care anymore. I wasn’t really sure why until my daughter helped clarify it all for me. She claims that I’ve mellowed out and just don’t care due to a couple of life events that have happened over the past two or three years.

“First of all, mom,” she said, “You’ve been spending lots of time with a grandbaby. You’ve been cuddling, talking and playing with her which is helping you develop and nurture what you hope will be a life-long close relationship with the newest person in your life.”

While that does sound like an impressive reason, it’s just not quite right, at least in regards to why I’m not focusing on politics anymore.

The truth is that babies require you to think about poo, lots and lots of poo. And there is only so much time in one’s life for poo so something had to um, drop. And what has dropped is taking notice of politics. And I have to admit, taking that dump really feels good.

The second life event that has supposedly mellowed me out, at least according to my daughter, is yoga. Not just any yoga, but Bikram Yoga, the type that is done in a hot and humid room.

“The consistent practice of yoga, Mom, has calmed and mellowed you. You are now able to breathe slowly and deeply which is rejuvenating your body with fresh oxygen.”

Again, while that sounds good, I’m afraid it’s just not true. The truth is, there is only so much hot air one can take in which means I have to diligently avoid anything politicians say.

Oh, maybe she’s right. All I know is I’d rather not bother with the political world any longer. But what will I write about instead? I don’t know but I’m sure that in between pulling a toddler out of the air vent and twisting myself into a pretzel, something’s going to catch my eye.

Or maybe I’ll just meander up the Big 4 Bridge and see what Harold and Hazel are up to.

SIGLINE: Clark County resident Debbie Harbeson welcomes your comeback to her comeback.

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